ES

Sexual Education

"God is love and in himself he lives a mystery of personal loving communion. Creating the human race in his own image . . .. God inscribed in the humanity of man and woman the vocation, and thus the capacity and responsibility, of love and communion."

"God created man in his own image . . . male and female he created them"; He blessed them and said, "Be fruitful and multiply"; "When God created man, he made him in the likeness of God. Male and female he created them, and he blessed them and named them Man when they were created." (CCC 2331)

As a parent, you teach your child everything from manners and faith practices to life skills or a new game. This responsibility to teach your child includes subjects or topics that can be difficult to discuss. Many parents find discussing matters of sex difficult with their child. It is important, though, that parents have ongoing conversations about sex and the church’s teaching on this subject.


Anticipate

The first step in educating your child in any subject is to properly educate yourself. Taking the time to learn about holistic sexuality from the Catholic perspective will equip you with the knowledge you need to begin these conversations. Many of the resources in this database can be applicable to adults.

The second step is to begin the conversation. You do not have to wait until you know everything to start the conversation with your child. If your child comes to you with a question that you do not know about, let them know that you will find the answer from a trusted source. Then be sure to share the appropriate information with your child. This helps build trust and opens the lines of communication; it also may stop your child from searching for the answers on their own for such an intimate subject. Please note that books and other resources in Compass can help address this topic at an age-appropriate level.

Recognize that it is never too early to begin this conversation. Many times, parents wait until their child approaches them about the subject, when they discover that their child has been exposed to sexual content (e.g., pornography) or in preparation or response to the subject being covered in a class at school. You can be proactive by talking about this topic in age-appropriate ways with your child, no matter their age. Having open communication starting at a young age will build up your confidence and reduce the awkwardness as your child grows in age.

When your child is young, you can talk about how God created each of us in his image and likeness and that that is good (Genesis 1:26) so we should strive to take care of our bodies. As they grow, you can help them refer to their body parts by the correct terms and remind them that there is no shame in using those words. Teaching a child respect and reverence for their body helps them build a habit of caring for themselves and allows them to recognize that other people’s bodies should be respected as well.

Also, know that middle school and high school students often “test the water” by asking about situations friends—real or hypothetical—might be in. This is an invitation to let them know you are listening, that you are not there to judge, but to help, and that you want to hear what they have to say.

Accompany

Sexual education should not be a one-time conversation or limited to just a class in school; it should be a continual discussion starting from a young age through adulthood. Even if you haven’t had those open lines of communication before, now is a great time to start! Let your child know that you want to be the person they come to with questions or concerns about sex. You can begin conversations by asking children what they already know. This is a great way to gage their own knowledge and correct any incorrect information they may have learned from peers, books, the internet, or media.

Your own witness is powerful as well. Make sure you convey the sacredness of your own body and the sexual act. Remind your child regularly that their body is good and should be respected. Help them understand that sex is a good thing, but only within marriage. Talk about how there are times and people with which to discuss these matters, but that it is typically a private topic not to be discussed openly with friends or on social media. Providing clear in the moment examples of how the media or other individuals do and do not convey the sacredness of this subject area can also be a helpful discussion starter with your child.


Answer

Confused and want to learn more?

Learn more about overcoming Pornography

Learn more about Modesty

Learn more about Gender and Sexual Identity

Learn more about Fruitful Conversations

Here I Am!
Children's Books
CatholicPsych Institute Blog
Resources
My Body is Me!
Children's Books
Talking with Your Teen about Sex
Books
Start Talking to Your Kids about Sex
Books
Skip the pill — choose wholeness for your teen
Articles
God doesn’t lie: Proclaiming the goodness of human sexuality
Articles
The Catholic Guide to Gender Theory
Videos
The Catholic Parents' Survival Guide
Books
Catholic Social Teaching for Youth
Books
Equipped: Raising Godly Digital Natives
Books
Gift and Grit: How Heroic Virtue Can Change Your Life and Relationships
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Male, Female, Other?
Books
Fruitful Conversation Guide
Resources
What to Do When Your Son Says He’s a Girl
Articles
How to Confidently Talk to Your Daughter About Cycles
Articles
Pearl and Thistle
Resources
Cycles & Spirituality
Books
The Reasoning for Using Anatomically Correct Terms With Your Kids
Articles
Think First & Stay Safe
Resources
Made for Love: Same-Sex Attraction and the Catholic Church
Books
Beyond the Birds and the Bees (Raising Sexually Whole and Holy Kids)
Books
Theology of the Body for Beginners
Books
Blessed are the Bored in Spirit: A Young Catholic's Search for Meaning by Mark Hart
Books
The Culture Project
Resources
Made This Way
Books
Men, Women, and The Mystery of Love by Edward Sri
Books
Cleansed
Books
Fertility, Cycles, and Nutrition: Self-care for improved cycles and fertility
Books
Keeping Your Child Safe in Public School
Articles
To Affirm or Not to Affirm: Gender Dysphoria in Kids
Podcasts
How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex (with as little awkwardness as possible)
Articles
Person & Identity (a project of the Ethics and Public Policy Center)
Resources
LoveEd: Raising Kids That Are Strong, Smart, & Pure
Resources
Wonderfully Made! Babies: A Catholic Perspective on How and Why God Makes Babies
Children's Books
Good Pictures Bad Pictures
Children's Books
Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.
Children's Books
Why Porn Is So Dangerous And How To Fight Back | The Catholic Talk Show
Videos
Men and Women are from Eden
Books
Integrity Restored
Resources